This #TransformationTuesday I thought I’d share a quick recap of my fitness journey over the last 4 years. It’s been a journey full of sweat, pain and tears. I’ve gone from “I need to be skinny” to “I need to be strong” and that I believe is the biggest transformation in my life. I have made a ton of mistakes (more on this blog post) and I have learnt life lessons from them. I have met some of the best, most humble people on this journey. I once treated food and exercise as punishement. Today, I understand the nourishment value of food, exercise, and recovery. Injury taught me patience. I learnt the importance of good sleep and rest. I learnt to love my body, but it took me quite a few years to get here. Sharing with you some of the major points in my fitness journey (tthose of you who have followed me on Instagram, let this be a throwback for you :D)
My first transformation post in August 2015.
I was lazy, I was insecure, I was a different person back then. Weight wasn’t about laziness, I guess I had too many issues ?Today I can proudly say that I’ve dealt with it on my own, and the sense of achievement and confidence it brings is astounding.
That’s me at 65kgs in 2013. And at 51kgs today ?
Another one from around the same time.
A lot has changed in the last two years.
Fast forward to November 2016
Feb 2016- 50kgs(so thin!), no visible tone on arms, calf muscle game strong (as always), strong core with well, not a toned tummy, and literally no bum. Nov 2016 – 54kgs, gains? A visible tone on arms, legs, and even the thighs, back muscles that show without flexing (booyah!) a super strong core and a tummy that feels strong, not flabby (and that little bit of flab won’t leave cos I suck at diets), and well, A BUM! I have a BUM! I started off with the goal of getting abs, hadn’t expected the goal to change midway. The core is here to stay, I’m quite confident about that. It’s the lack of a butt that had me stressed, hahaa. I never bothered to concentrate on getting a nice butt, that is until I met @yogeshdiddee who gave some serious cute butt goals (ughs) Whatevs, this new year I’m getting a bum. Yay.
March 2017- I was getting wiser.
“Ouch” Yeah, coming across this picture made me cringe too. “Why be ashamed” followed soon after.
2012 : picture taken in Mumbai. I didn’t give two hoots about what I looked like. Gokul was second home, chilli chicken and Vat69 was what I spent my money on. I tried waking up early a couple of weeks for a jog at Gateway, then just went all ‘YOLO stay wasted’ I was 22, what else would I have to care about anyway?
Over the years I’ve realised what made me adopt the healthy lifestyle was the fact that I started to love my body. I didn’t punish myself for being unhealthy, I just wanted it to be a better version of what it was. When I was in Mumbai, all that I said to myself was ‘life sucks, this is what it is’ and didn’t do a thing about living healthy. Things changed when I moved out, I suddenly started doing things out of my comfort zone, I was happy, and I accepted my weight and self esteem issues and suddenly realised I wanted to do something about it. I think loving my body for what it was is the only reason that made me take up fitness seriously. If you don’t love yourself, how will you ever take up anything that is good for you? You know what I mean? Accept yourself for who you are, everything else will follow. Stop blaming yourself for being ‘overweight’ or ‘fat’ 55kgs looks different on you and me. Set realistic goals. Easier said than done, I know. The #fitfam is here to help?
And listen, this isn’t about being skinny or thin, it’s about being healthy. And happy. Healthy shows on your face ❤
Skinny gave way to strong in 2017.
Back in 2012, I decided I am going to be as thin as I could get (from a size 6 I started fitting into a size 2 with ease.) It’s 2017 and I’m concentrating on being the strongest I can ever be (from a size 2 I got to a size 4) When it comes to fitness, remember one thing – one size doesn’t fit all.
Fitness was finally a lifestyle, and I found myself easily adapting to new fitness routines even on vacation.
Not a drastic before-after, neither do I have anything much to say except this – it took me 3 years to lose the fat and convert it to muscle, without going on crash diets or any extreme weight loss routine. I ate what I wanted to, reduced the junk I used to literally live on, also got off alcohol for a while, and continued working out. Stop aiming for immediate results, please understand that it takes time. I am not going to propagate drastic weight loss or muscle gains cos it is not what I do. I’ve worked hard for this, and you need to understand that this is more of a mental game than anything else. If you’re ready to put in that hard work, let’s talk. If you’re looking for some magical formula, I’m sorry I don’t think I can be of much use to you. Fitness is a lifestyle, not a seasonal hobby.
November 2017– I was finally able to share what being fit meant. It wasn’t onyl about lifting, looking good, being able to wear what I wanted to. It was a 360 degree change in my lifestyle, and I was finally able to share it with everyone.
I’ve spoken a lot about how I don’t have many pictures from back in the day when I used to be 65kgs(2013), full of pizza and whiskey. I managed to find this one, and for a second I thought it had been stretched or something. Turns out this is the amount of space I required in pictures. Transformation Tuesday this time is about losing those extra pounds and inches, giving up on junk food, controlling portion size, and most importantly gaining the confidence to believe in myself.All this unhealthiness ultimately plays with your mind, where you’re constantly doubting yourself, feeling you’re not good enough, choosing to hide behind the lens rather than go in front of it because OMG I AM AWKWARD OMG MY ARMS OMG MY STOMACH and what not. There’s this nagging feeling to HIDE; I’d hide behind people & not stand up for myself, I’d hide my arms under flowy sleeves, I’d hide the stomach rolls under loose blouses, you get the drift. This transformation for me has been both physical and mental, but it’s the mental strength that I’ve gained that has made me stand proud today. It started with me being happy about who I was, and only then did I understand the importance of fitness. That’s when weight loss just started. This one is dedicated to conditioning myself to be confident even when I was 10kgs overweight. I’m at 55kgs now, 10kgs less than the picture on the left, I still don’t like a few parts of my body, I’ll not deny that. But all these years of constantly trying to achieve something new has made me realise it’s confidence that will matter at the end of the day. Knowing that I’m still learning to stand out, that’s what keeps me going, that’s what keeps me happy. Being on this fitness journey has been the best journey of my life❤️
I could relate to the importance of nourishment.
One year six months of no alcohol and running had me get to a shape that did not resemble a circle☺️ Today I enjoy a night out with my sangrias and/or whiskey. But if asked to give up for a bit, I will. I CAN. Those 18months of being a teetotaler made me realise if I could be stubborn enough to get to a goal, I would. Patience. Resilience. All those good things. Today, I’m reminded of this time once again as I’m recovering, slowly and patiently waiting to get back to turning on the beast mode again. I thought I’d be angry, frustrated, guilty, I’d punish myself by not eating. I am glad I’m over that. I eat, I stay active by walking and cycling, and I just enjoy lazing around not working because I guess my body wanted me to take a break. This #transformationtuesday is dedicated to being happy with everything that life throws at you, the good, bad and ugly☺️❤️
Today, I stand at 55kgs. I gain weight, I lose it easily. I stay active, I nourish my body. I have a proper routine, discipline dictates my life, and my mind is at peace, even during stressful times. To some, I might be “fat” or “muscular” To me, it’s still called being “strong” and the opinion of others does not affect me. FINALLY.
Once upon a time I aimed at being thin, so of course I ran 10km 6 days a week, because ‘you must be skinny come what may’ was all that fitness was about. I’d hyperventilate seeing the scale move beyond 50kgs. I’d go on extreme diets (I clearly remember a beach body diet where I ate apples all day KIDS PLEASE DO NOT DO THIS TO YOURSELF PLEASE EAT I HATE MYSELF FOR EVEN TRYING THIS) and be obssessed about my weight. There’s a difference of 3 years in these pictures (muscle mass and toning, 50-56kgs), and today (right) I’m much happier and at peace with every goddamn thing in the world. Being thin isn’t a fitness goal, fitness goals should sound like ‘i want to feel energetic and strong and happy’ etc etc. I didn’t care about any of that, as long as I was thin things were fine. Today I literally cringe seeing pictures from the time I started losing weight. Being skinny was not helping me with anything tbh, I wasn’t happy, I was weak most of the times, I was also extremely stressed and annoyed with things around me. Today, I treat food and exercise as nourishment for my body, and not as a punishement. I eat around 2500 calories daily, and work out to stay fit. On days I’m not feeling it, I rest. I eat clean most of the times, but I don’t kill myself for eating that extra slice of pizza if in case I ever do, know what I mean? When people talk of transformation, they only show the physical side of it. But there’s a lot that changes in the mental and emotional space too. You become a positive, happy person. You are your own motivation, and it doesn’t have anything to do with being ‘thin’ I’ve accepted my flaws, worked my way around them, and today I’m proud of what I’ve built. I’m at 56kgs now, stronger, happier and at peace? Don’t run after being thin please, fitness isn’t only about aesthetics. Aim at being a nice person too, and true fitness will do that to you.
If you notice, my style of sharing my stories changed too. My confidence and knowledge improved. Along with physical and mental changes, I changed emotionally too. I also had a lot more to share later, because from a rigid mindset of “only running is good enough for me” to a flexible, overall fit lifestyle that includes running, yoga, swimming and lifting now, I realised what holistic wellness really meant.
I am still on this journey, I have a lot more to learn, and I will continue sharing these updates with you. I do not wish to be a certified trainer because writing and story telling is what I love. I am studying for the ISSA course, but I’l be honest with you, it’s because I am curious and have always loved Biology. Quite sure I won’t be a trainer, so I am sorry to disappoint all those who’ve been asking me to train them :)
Lastly, thank you for all the support you’ve shown me, even when I was slowly making my way towards a fit lifestyle. You guys have been great supporters and teachers, and I will be grateful to all of you for life :)
(Apologies for the picture quality, I took them off straight from my Instagram)